Monday, October 31, 2011

October 30, 2011

Today as I woke her up, she mentioned that she won't be going for the choir practice after all. Was very relieved about it as we both know she needed a lot of rest, as even today, she would be out the whole day preparing for the Halloween party.

Later after church, she had to practice for the drama for the BGR series that Pastor Kevin would be preaching this coming November. She mentioned she chose Ethan to be her 'boyfriend' and really can't imagine if it would be another guy. Very funny statement, and yes, to be honest, I am JEALOUS. xD

Right after the drama practice, she then had to prepare for the Halloween party. She showed some of her pictures of her dressing as a witch, and boy, she must have been the MOST PRETTIEST, SEXIEST, MOST RAVISHING-LOOKING WITCH I HAVE EVER SEEN!!!!!!!!!

ELAINE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


I bet all the guys must be trying to 'pikat' her throughout the night. *jealousy starts to kick in* :p

After the Halloween party, we manage to chat awhile on Skype before we headed to dreamland. I kept complimenting how she looked like as a witch, which she blushingly accepted. Hehe. Tomorrow would be another long week ahead. Hoping and praying for the best things ahead of us!

October 29, 2011

Today she would be going for her dance practice. Ethan woke up very late again, so we manage to chat a bit longer on Whatsapp. Even in the car, we shared a lot of sweet things together and Elaine continually kept making me blush. She's just so amazing. :)

She went to get a couple of things for her Halloween party. She showed a sneak peak of a picture on Facebook to what she'll be dressing as tomorrow. Long, sharp nails. @@ COOL.

To my surprise, her practice went on until late at night! The Halloween party is tomorrow after all, so I guess that is why they had to keep practicing and practicing and practicing. We chatted on Skype a while and she then had to sleep already as she also would be going for choir tomorrow morning. Was kinda worried if she can actually make it as she has been lacking of sleep for the whole week, not to mention having back to back dance practices.

Elaine, take good care of yourself ya. Hope you will be fully rested even though it will only be but a few hours of rest again. Miss you so much!

October 28, 2011

Gave her a morning call this morning. We chatted a bit, and she then had to go for college. I sent her a couple of videos to make her happy. :) Hope she liked it.

After college, she then had to go for her dance practice. Amidst the break, we manage to chat a bit on Whatsapp. She even sent me a photo of her during the practice. She looks really great :)

She came back tired. How I wish I could give her a massage or treat her on a spa. One day, one day... hehe. We then chatted a while on Skype and then wished each other goodnight.


Love you so much, Elaine. :)

October 27, 2011

Woke up today and was thankful that my Wi-Fi was working again. Elaine had already woke up then, even though she only had a few hours of sleep. Gosh. It truly is a stretching season for her. Today I was on my vacation leave, so I was hoping to be of much help for her again, as I don't have much to do at home alone anyways.

We continued just chatting on Whatsapp throughout the day. We talked about Baddogz photography, which I commented has very good photos taken (though some of it are actually obscene). Later after dinner, she went for a photoshoot as her assignment together along with some of her coursemates. She took a very nice slow shutter speed photo with my name written on it. So touched. Aww. :")

Upon reaching home... her Wi-Fi is back and alive!!!! So happy :D We chatted on Skype that night as if we haven't chatted for weeks. I accompanied her again with her assignments. She was really thankful for it, and I of course did not mind at all. :) She decided to sleep a bit early as she didn't have the necessary material to finish up what she was doing, and hence we then wished each other goodnight.

Sleep well, dearest Elaine. :")

October 26, 2011

Beginning of the day, we talked about weight. As we both know, I'm currently going to the gym again after not being regularly going there for the past two months due to stress, work, sicknesses and... laziness. Urgh. But starting now I've committed myself to go there again and have aimed to at least lose 1kg in a week.

Asides from going to college and all, she also is preparing for the upcoming Halloween party, as well as dance practices for the flash mob. Very cool to know that she has been given the chance to dance, which, of course what she loves doing. :) Couldn't be much more happier for her.

She stayed up the whole night again for her assignments. I tried to help her as much as I could, as well as to accompany her too. Though there was no Wi-Fi, I could still occasionally Whatsapp her to see how she was doing. Sadly though.. my internet connection suddenly went down, and I could have no means at all to communicate with her. She actually tried to check up on me whether I was still there. Sigh. Internet connection, why did you fail me this time.

Sorry Elaine.. nevertheless I'm praying for you. Stay strong ya.

Sunday, October 30, 2011

October 25, 2011

Another wonderful morning to wake up at. Even more beautiful when you know the person who loves you so much is awaiting for you to wake her up and then just talk and share sweet nothings. Though it was on Whatsapp this time as her Wi-Fi is still down, nevertheless it was a special moment once again. :)

She wasn't feeling well today, not to mention having migraine as well. I could only pray and hope that she'll recover soon.. We didn't talk that night, but at least we still Whatsapp each other to check how we're both doing. Stay strong Elaine! Get well soon too. :)

Friday, October 28, 2011

October 24, 2011

I gave her a nice wake up call that morning. I can't stop telling her how much I love her and that I love to call her early in the morning to hear her beautiful voice. :) We had a great time together, although short. Still it was really amazing what we did. Awh.. Elaine. You are just so BEAUTIFUL. :")

Later that night, I manage to talk to Ethan, Richard, Eric, Phei Wen and Elaine. They were all in Ethan's car, whom of which he was fetching all of them back. It sure was a good time just hearing their voices and joking around with them. I also informed them that I would be seeing them soon, and not to mention, calling Elaine a 'lioness'. :")

Sadly, that night, her Wi-Fi was DOWN. We were both really looking forward to Skype and share about the things that has happened on our day but... oh well. I still manage to call her though, and though it was short, but every single second and minute was preciously worth. Gotta keep her in my prayers. She's being stretched this season.

Monday, October 24, 2011

October 23, 2011

Today.

Today was awesome. Words cannot describe how much we have gotten much closer now. I think our love for each other has reached a point where we could never replace each other with anyone else.

I accompanied her again that night for an all-nighter as she continued on with one of the assignments given by her lecturer. Kinda think the lecturers in her college are giving the students way too much work to do in a short period of time, not to mention there is no semester break for them to recuperate. Awh man.

An amazing thing happened while we were on Skype that night. We got bonded and well, the rest is.. just magical.


Elaine Tan Shi En,


I LOVE YOU. :")

October 22, 2011

She went out early today to go for a photoshoot session at KL Bird Park! So cool right? In the end she manage to take some pretty awesome pictures, and boy was I so proud of her. :) She was using a Canon EOS 550D with an 18-135mm lens. Hmm. Though not the best lens, but the pictures taken were really nice! Should I really go for 60D, or just settle down with a 550D/600D. Hmm. *ponders

Anyways, today we didn't talk much on the phone as she was tired. Despite that, every minute and every moment means a lot. So excited to see her soon.. hmm hmm :)

October 21, 2011 (Special)

"Always  have, always will."

And that is the gist of my love for you Elaine. :)

Strong words to say, but to really mean it? I do Elaine. If you could really see my heart and know how big my love is for you, you could probably think it is close to, if not, infinite itself. :)

We have a great time that night on the phone via Skype. You had a very fruitful yet tiring day ahead, what with attending classes as well as leading your CG. Such beauty, strength and determination, I adore much.
I could only be a pillar of strength, a beacon of light for you. I wish and oh how much I really wish I could do much more, but please bear all of it for now Elaine.

Soon dear, soon. :)

October 20, 2011

It was a day for me to get ready and prepare for all the necessary documents for my passport appointment. I first had to go to the police report to get their authorized report, as well as the notary public office, to get a law firm stamp approval stating that I have indeed testified that my passport was lost.

Despite all that, all I could think in my mind was Elaine. I'm always so worried for her.. checking whether she has enough sleep or not... whether she is doing well with the assignments given by lecturers to her... not to mention her responsibilities in CG and ministry. Such a strong girl. Really admire her a lot. Hehe. :)

We didn't talk much when she got back at home as she was really exhausted from the events of today, as well as yesterday. To me, all that matters is for her to have a good sleep and rest. Whether it would be just 10, or perhaps even less, 5 minutes on the phone, I'm totally okay with it. Just being there to listen to what she has to say is good enough.

Love you lots Elaine. :)

October 19, 2011

We woke up and apologized to each other about what happened last night. Really love her so much.


She shared this movie about the modern day Beauty and the Beast. Kinda interesting, but in the end, Tangled is more of OUR movie. :p


She had to do lots of assignments and I volunteered to accompany her throughout the entire night on Skype. It really was a wonderful experience just being there for her all the way, though I did offend her with a slip of my tongue about something. Eeks. Sorry dear. >.< Promise won't say it again...

Anyways we did manage to pull out an all-nighter. Her painting sure was gorgeous and creatively colored and done. Very proud of her skills and talents :) It was a good thing that I was still on MC so at least I would be able to spend the rest of the day compensating for the lack of sleep. I'm more worried for her as she is the one who has to continue to attend class and even after that, continue on with more assignments..

God, continually to give her more strength. She needs it. Let me be there for her as well.

October 18, 2011

Her Wi-Fi is alive again! ::celebrates::

However.. later that night, we had a very big misunderstanding on who was going to call each other that night. :( In the end we both got disappointed at each other and just slept without giving a proper goodbye.

So sorry Elaine... I was just so excited to be able to talk with you again, and I believe you felt the same way too..

Saturday, October 22, 2011

October 17, 2011

Just as we already wished each other goodnight.. suddenly Elaine rang my phone and wanted to talk to me again. Good thing I had enough phone credit to just be there to comfort her and assure her that I'm there for her no matter what.

It's amazing how our relationship has been going so far.. despite all the ups and downs, yet we always come back stronger and loving each other more than before. How I wish she could be mine right now. *smiles

Early that morning, I gave her a nice wake up call. I could only hope and pray for her that she'll have the strength, wisdom and favor to cope with the new busyness she is currently adapting at the moment. I'll try my best to be there to support her no matter what it takes.

That night, we managed to talk and discuss some of the assignments that she was given. Was so happy I could be there to help her find some materials that are related to it. She had to pull-up an all-nighter, and the next thing you know, she accidentally fell asleep. Aww. Times like this I really wish I could be in her room, carrying her to her bed and tucking her into her blanket, giving her a goodnight kiss on her forehead. :)

Monday, October 17, 2011

October 16, 2011

She fell asleep last night while we were talking. I was quiet worried to what actually happened to her last night as to why she suddenly didn't respond to my Whatsapp. Good to know that she was okay, just that she was so tired she didn't even realize that she actually fell asleep! So cute :p

She did ask me a couple of interesting questions about herself. Elaine, if you are reading this ---- I love you exactly for who are you :) I'm proud with every achievements that you have accomplished and I couldn't be much happier knowing that things have taking a turn for a better in your life compared to how it was last time. I wonder what are the things that you are proud of with me. Hehe. *curious

Later on. she mentioned about her having some stomach pain (not the one that you have to go to the toilet) since yesterday. Now I am REALLY worried to why she is experiencing such pain. Could it be gastric? Oh man.. and what is more saddening is that.. she is no longer hosting HTV Live on the week where Jayeslee would be coming to perform. SO SAD. SO DEVASTATINGLY SAD. :((((((((( WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY. WHYYYYYY DID THEYYYYY. HOW COULD THEYYYYYYYYYYY? Poor Elaine and Phei Wen.... words really cannot describe how sad they were. I tried to comfort Phei Wen as well on Facebook.. I'm hoping they both would recover from the disappointment soon.. Elaine's bringing her for a meal together tomorrow. I also informed Phei Wen that I would be treating her when I come back too. This incident particularly hit Elaine very hard. God.. why did You allow this to happen to her? She already had a rough month so far and this had to come as well. God, please heal her heart... and in anyway, restore back that joy and whatever has been lost to her in manyfolds. Please Papa?

She felt much better during the night. Her dad managed to bring her around to get all the necessary materials for one of her assignments/project. So happy for her :) She really wanted those things badly, but was unable to obtain them due to someone's procrastination. *coughs* Anyways we then had a good time Whatsapping each other before we went to sleep. It was kind of late, but I'm really happy to how things have recovered between the both of us, and despite not being able to chat on Skype for the entire month so far, we are still going on strong and that our love for each other have become much deeper.

Thank You Papa. We both continue to uphold our relationship into Your mighty hands. :')

October 15, 2011

This morning, we shared our sweet moments together again. She then requested for me take some photos of myself as it has been awhile since she last saw me. But I'm camera shy! >.< Managed to take some but eventually the best thing would be for me to see her in person itself. :p

Nothing much happened during the day. Oh, I really loved the way she looked and dressed up before she went to church. Vivaciously stunning! God, thank you for making her so beautiful. She truly is a beauty.. not just on the outside but also on the inside. :")

We spoke on the phone later that night. We discussed about certain things, but mainly about what are my plans now. Come back work for church? Bible School? 3 years? We're basing the answer from what Pastor could advice. Hmm.. I wonder what really lies ahead in my life.. as well as hers. God, do open tangible doors and lead the way to what you already have planned for us.

Sunday, October 16, 2011

October 14, 2011

She couldn't attend college today as she wasn't feeling well at all. :( Poor Elaine... she must have worn herself out from all the things that has happened so far. Sigh. Can you transfer her sickness to me God? Let me be the one who will carry this sickness through instead of her. She still has so much things to handle... Please God, heal her. Make her body strong again.. supply her with supernatural strength that comes from You so that she may be able to go through this rough and dry season. Use it as only you can to be there for her in any circumstances possible too. I love her so much Lord. Her pain is my pain, her tears are my tears. *kneels down and pray*

Come CG time.. hehe. The surprise came into play. She said she teared from how her CG + Ethan's did the appreciation time with her. I wonder what were the sincere and heartfelt words they all shared to her that made her teared. Hehe. Nicole said she actually cried and was seen wiping those tears. Hmm. HEHEHEHE. Mission Accomplished! Phew. Now on to my next surprise for her.. I wonder what I should do next? *ponders

Friday, October 14, 2011

October 13, 2011

We spoke a lot on the phone today. Though her Wi-Fi was still down, it didn't matter to me how long, or how many times I would call her just to talk her and hear how she was doing so far.

Somehow as time passes by, we got to settle those differences slowly, but surely. In the end no matter, my love for her is never changing.

Just before I head to work, she 'hugged' me from behind. That feeling was so indescribable! It was like I totally felt she was really hugging me! Wow! That totally made my day. I cannot deny how touched I was when she did that. :")

I brewed up a plan to sweetly surprise with her CG members and Ethan's CG (they'll be combining CG tomorrow). The plan was after CG, they will all take a short heart to heart moment to express their gratitude and appreciation towards Elaine, especially at this season where she is really stretched to the maximum. Ethan confirmed with me that it is possible, so yeah, will be looking forward to hear her 'cry'. Hehe.

We spoke again on the phone at night. She told me she was not feeling very well. Was quite worried that she might fell sick. Wanna hug her so tightly and tell her that everything is going to be okay. Oh man. After that we continued sharing sweet things together on Whatsapp.

How I love you so much Elaine. How I dearly love you so. :')

October 12, 2011

We were recovering from the events of yesterday.

We did manage to clear a few things up last night...

It was the first time Elaine really got so mad at me..

We both apologized for what had happened. However on my side, I felt that the pain was still so strong there. I tried my best to be happy and strong for her, but I guess that did not happen after all. I still cried whenever I think of what happened yesterday. Who would have thought my heart would be this fragile. Maybe I really am in love with this girl. As they say, the deeper the love, the bigger the hurt.

She had so many assignments to do, including all her other responsibilities. To add the salt in her wounds, this argument had to happen. Felt so bad I couldn't do much to help her. Sigh. Why do I felt so powerless. So hopeless.

God, please help her. Help her in any ways possible. From my side I could only cheer her from afar, but I know that You can help her more than what she can even imagine. *tears*

October 11, 2011

Today.

Today we had a very terrible argument.

Maybe we both were expecting so much. Maybe we both were so sad, disappointed, angry towards each other.

Maybe.. there simply was just a big misunderstanding that we have to clear up.


We cried. We cried so much.



I'm so sorry my dearest love...

God, help us.. this is not what we both want.. it hurts so much..

Tuesday, October 11, 2011

October 10, 2011

Woke up today and we both shared really sweet things to each other. I was telling her how lucky I was that there is an angel who actually loves me back the way I love her, and she mentioned something that she told me before... that whoever would be my girlfriend would be the happiest person ever, and though we are not officially one (yet), she said she indeed has been happy till now. Aww. :) I promised her that I would continue to make her happy. That's a fact.

She had a long day at college and right after that, she would need to prepare the skit with Ethan and some of her other CG members. I on the other hand was preparing my set of skit to them as well. It was the story about Ethan (yes, Ethan) and Jasmine (his imaginary girlfriend).

Later on that night, I told her that I actually have read all of her old blogs. There was this particular one that she poured out all of her thoughts, emotions and feeling towards Vincent last time. I teared reading it because it was really.. really.. painful. Her love for him was so true.. yet he treated her so badly. And because of that, she still has some fear of certain things when it comes to relationship. Vincent. How could you. Sigh.

Apart from that I also extracted all the emails we both had sent to each other from when our friendship first started. If the thief didn't steal my phone and passport in the first place, I wouldn't have lost all the precious emails that was sent to all of my dear friends. Urgh. Oh well. Everything happens for a reason. We wished more sweet things to each other and went to slumber. Zzz...

October 9, 2011

I woke up still feeling fuzzy and have a slight headache. At least it wasn't that as it was last night. Really thankful for a good night's rest as well as God's healing hands. Truly the power of a simple prayer, knowing that when you pray, believe with all your heart that you will receive it and God will grant it :)

Also, thank God for the creation of Paracetamol a.k.a Panadol back in Malaysia. It helps a lot in terms of relieving that headache. Phew. Anyways enough about myself. Back to the blog. :p

Elaine had a very good sleep last night too. Today was her chance to recuperate from her hectic week. Sunday. Truly the best rest day ever. :) I wonder how would it be like if either one of us got fever next time and that how would we both take care of each other. Hehe.

Later that night after dinner, we manage to talk for 30 minutes. It was really really wonderful to be able to hear her voice for that entire period of time. She talked about a lot of things.. but we both knew there more than we could actually share or talk more. She also mentioned that...


SHE WILL BE HOSTING HTV LIVE ON THE DATE THAT JAYESLEE WOULD BE PERFORMING IN CHURCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So happy for her!!!!!!! :D SO SO HAPPY!!!! WAHH HTV!!!! FINALLY!!!!! WHAT MORE WITH PHEI WEN, HER OTHER HALF!!! (I'm Elaine's future REAL other half.. so at the moment I'll just be jealous)

What more, her CG was picked to do a short skit for Pastor Kevin's upcoming BGR series sermon this coming mid-November. Interestingness! I was more than willing to contribute some ideas and scripts as to see what and how the whole skit would be like. Oh and I found out that Elaine loves quotes too! Going to try to find some nice quotes to share with her later. :)

Just to share one very nice quote to close this post ;

"It is not that beauty endears, it is love that makes us see beauty."
-Leo Nicolaevich Tolstoy 

October 8, 2011

It's the weekends!

However I can't rejoice knowing that Elaine is still undergoing such pain. I'll always remember what she said last night.. "When I don't want to be hugged, just keep hugging me tightly. Don't let go." Hopefully when the time comes when such an event happens.. I'll keep her in my arms until she is finally okay. :)

Today is the day she would be going for the photoshoot by Vincent together with Phei Wen. Adele and Kevin Tan (?) tagged along as well. I'm pretty sure they would be able to take lots of awesome pictures of both of them. Elaine wore her very elegant, angel-like dress, which of course makes her look like an angel. <3

I'm in love. (again hahaha)

After the photoshoot, she stayed on in church for choir practice. Little did she know that I actually coordinated with Phei Wen, Ethan and Dennis to help me surprise her by getting her favourite Starbucks drink - Green Tea Frappucino, which coincidentally is my favourite Starbucks drink too. ;) Boy, was she so happy when the plan succeeded smoothly! Thumbs up for well-planned coordination. Hoho.

At night, she told me she has been holding back her tears from the stress and sadness that she is coping. What else could I ever offer but my comfort words.. sigh. Why, why oh why I can't even be there for the girl that I love? Sigh.

Oh and if you're reading this Elaine, I'm actually having fever all of a sudden. No idea how I suddenly contracted it but you told me to go and sleep first because you would only be back very late. Yet I insisted to wait and stand by just to make sure everything will be okay for you, despite me blowing lots of hot air from my chest and an occasional shiver. Fever go away.. I need to be there for Elaine.. give me a few more hours t stay on till she finally sleeps.

October 7, 2011

Woke up today and tried to help her with one of her assignment because she was quite packed with a lot of them. Sayang her so much that I was kinda desperate to help her with whatever I can. The title was about the biodata of herself. The format was actually a mind map, but due to the poor reception, I heard it was an essay. Big difference, I know. @@. So.. no thanks to the confusion, I was practically slowing her down and that is bad. Yikes. Sorry Elaine!

In college today, she received a very cool present from one of her classmates, Izak (based on her Facebook name). It was red-colored bunny shaped bag with a bowtie on its tummy. Kinda reminds me of one of the bunnies in Totoro, a Japanese anime with cute and weird looking creatures. So nice to have such classmates that even when you only know them for a short while, they already started treating you as if you were friends for a very long time. Definitely a friend worth keeping :)

Later on, she went for Roller Skating with her CG. Really funky and cool what they get to do for their outing. Too bad I couldn't join them. Awwh. Seems like Elaine could actually skate eh. Man, I regret not spending more time on the Ice-Skating rink back at Sunway Pyramid last time. Boo.

She came back pretty much tired already, plus Wi-Fi was still down. Tomorrow would be her photoshoot with Phei Wen! Finally :) So happy for her taht she won the competition from Vincent's Photography contest. But before that, she mentioned on Whatsapp how stressful and in pain she was in her heart... I was really really worried and sad that I couldn't be there when she's going through such a rough time. :'( Elaine.. stay strong.. I'll think of something to cheer you up tomorrow..

October 6, 2011

Today marks the day that I will start work at 12.00pm-9.00pm. A very interesting schedule, nonetheless good enough for me to arrange certain things for myself, as well as for Elaine. :)

It was quite sad to have her Wi-Fi still being down today. We both have so much to share and to tell each other! Plus, her voice. Oh how I need to hear her voice! Elaine, can you be mine, like, NOW? ::screams::

Anyways, I gave her a morning call through my regular load. Really hate the reception of the line as we both could barely hear each other, but that disappointment was compensated with our continued sweet conversation last night. Truly a great way to kickstart the day, knowing that there is someone out there, loving you with all her heart. Hehe.

Today she didn't have classes the whole day, instead it was a workshop instead. Not really sure how the whole workshop was like, but I get to see her drawing this adorable looking 'thingy' called "Dweey". Pretty cool on how the anyone is free to paint it as anyhow they like as deemed by the individual themselves. Wonder how her's looks like. Hmm.

Later at night she had Bible Study with Phei Wen. Basing on how it was, I'm guessing they were able to bond and share out each other's side of story even more. I think it's really nice for Elaine to get to talk into Phei Wen's life more. This girl has so much potential in her. People might even mistaken them as real life siblings in fact. Haha. Truly a wonderful friendship they have. :)


On a side note, R.I.P. Steve Jobs :(

Thursday, October 6, 2011

October 5, 2011

The fact that we weren't able to talk on Wi-Fi last night and this morning made us miss each other so soooooo much! Man, I miss her voice.. her cute, sweet, angelic voice. We did share a lot of sweet things on Whatsapp though.. but still, it can't beat the feeling of really having a conversation with her. It was my off day today, so I was pretty much bummed up on what I can do to fill up my day.

She had to go for driving class retake this morning. It was quite delayed though as there were actually about 180 students also taking the exams. In the end she waited so long and finally at 12.00pm she finally got the chance to retake the test. This time she succeeded, so praise God! :)

Just right after college, she mentioned that there was a person harassing her through her phone. Not sure how he got her number... but really, this kind of matter should be reported to the police! RAWRRRRRRR WHO IS THAT @#@*#@_(#*@(*_#(@_ GRRRRRRRRR!!!!!! >(
*coughs*

Anyways, later at night after she has just got back from her Bible Study exam with Chia Huey, she said that she wanted to sleep immediately as it was really a tiring day for her. But before she slept, we continued Whatsapp-ing a lot of sweet things together. It was really.. magical, an undescribable feeling, to know the girl that you love so much deep down in the bottom of my heart, feeling the same way that I do to her, wanting to just be there and kiss and hug each other tightly. Oh, how I wish you were mine now Elaine... oh how I love you so so so much! We then bid each other goodnight, tucked in the most sweetest of memories. :)

October 4, 2011

Today I volunteered to give her a morning call as early as 5.30am. Sadly however.... I woke up 40 minutes late! Oh no.. She was the one instead who had to wake me up. Felt really guilty and bad to have disappointed her. She had to do a lot of assignments that morning and she emphasized a lot on how much she needed to wake up early then. So sorry Elaine. :( *sigh*

Yet, despite that, she forgave me and still wished me all the best at work. Aww man. How could I not love her even more!! You are the BEST Elaine! *blows a million kisses*

After work (and after college for her), she told me about a secret she shared with me in the past. She revealed the whole story about it. She apologized for not telling the whole truth about it because she was scared I would really be disappointed.

Elaine, no matter had happened, I still love you the same. My love for you will never change. I love you more than just a romance, BGR kind of love.. I love you with the same kind of love that God gives to us. Agape love, my dear. Agape. :)

We couldn't Skype that night because her Wi-Fi was down. Ah well. It's okay. She must have been too tired to talk at night anyways. Prayed for her and wished her a goodnight's sleep ahead. :)

October 3, 2011

Today she woke up informing she wasn't able to do her assignment (about a map) using Adobe Illustrator. She was really scared that her lecturer might do something bad to her as not only she wasn't able to really understand how to use the program, but also since she was always late for his class (no thanks to Justin for fetching Elaine late all the time. Grrr.). I was so worried to that I really prayed hard for her lecturer's favor upon her. Thank God He provided two awesome classmates, Eric and Shadow to help her with it. Phew. I wasn't even able to concentrate on work that time.

She spent most of her time at night doing her assignments. Felt really bad that I couldn't help her at all. Awhh :( She then informed me about a website called lexusmodeling.com and that she needs help to collect points with it. I was really delighted that I could finally do something for her :)

I confessed a couple of things to her and she was happy with how open I was regarding those things. I guess it really helps to build our trust for each other more. I feel happy just to know how our relationship is going, despite having its own set of ups and downs.

I love you, Elaine :)

Wednesday, October 5, 2011

October 2, 2011

Today was a much better day. I felt more refreshed and calm after a rollercoaster of emotion ride yesterday. The preaching by Pst. Phil Pringle was really really good. It was really worth the rush. I guess my agitated nature yesterday really affected Elaine a lot. But I thank God, all that was cleared up as I properly apologize and show my appreciation towards her this morning.

I also took the chance to go back home so that I can chat with her through Wi-Fi. I told her how much I realize I really can't live without her. She is just too precious to me. She smiled and was happy with the words I have said. I really mean Elaine. I really really mean it.

Later at night, she went out with her family, including her grandparents to celebrate her birthday at Shabu-Shabu. That place really brings back great memories as I remembered last year we celebrated her birthday there together with the gang. I'll make sure we'll go there again Elaine. :) Let's order a lot of pork stripes! Yeah!

When she got back, she informed me that starting this month onwards, her schedule and time would be more hectic than usual. We really won't get to talk much anymore.. but nevertheless my love for her will never waver, but instead will get stronger. We talked a short while on Skype before we slept. Elaine, please wait for me. I'm going to make you the happiest girl alive. :')

Sunday, October 2, 2011

Special Edition

Dear Diary,

I wanna just say how much I appreciate Kevin's hard work and his effort and everything he has done for me this whole year whether it's big or small. Infact not just this year...from the start of our relationship..and as bro and sis..

Even before we fell in love with each another, Kevin never failed to to call me almost every night before I go to sleep. Even the slightest thing like because I was afraid of thunders, Kevin would still be there to comfort me.

He is the only person that truly understand and listens to me and not judge me for the wrongs that I have done. He is the only and one and only one who never got tired of calling me, JUST to hear me cry every night because of my heartbreaks.

Yesterday I thought to myself maybe I shouldn't disturb him. I was abit moody myself and decided to sulk by myself that night. But when I was about to sleep, I felt that something was missing. YOU. Kevin...you were missing..and I was afraid at night cos it was late and my room was too quiet..in the end i couldn't resist but to call him so I could talk to him. Although I still felt upset over what happened, I felt happy and peaceful just by hearing his voice. I can't live without him. I realised I really really can't live without him. I would feel..alone..and part of me is missing..and that I love him so so so much.

Kevin, I love you.
I'm so sorry for merajuking alot. I don't know how you can bear it, stand it, and have so much patience with a girl like me, but I really am touched with all you did. Especially for my birthday. Please don't say you blew it or you failed. You have no idea how much you made my birthday happier this year. Without you, it would have been worse.. of course without my cg members and church members too >.<

Kevin, I truly love you. I cannot wait to be yours.

Saturday, October 1, 2011

October 1, 2011

It's already the month of October. Phew. Time sure does past by quickly. Looking back at the older posts, it is as if those were already old memories. Thank God for this blog, that I am able to record down the events that has happened for reminiscing sakes. :)

Initially she was to wake up early as to prepare for her driving lessons on the slopes, which in the end, she did really well. Proud of her for that. However upon waking up early to give her a morning call, she said it wasn't necessary anymore as the driving lesson time was pushed to a much later hour. So here I was wanting to talk to her badly, but she on the other hand was really tired and wanted to sleep. Of course I respected her decision and hoped later at night we are able to talk more.

Later around the afternoon, I got really emotional as my half day leave was rejected. I vented out my frustration towards Elaine, and in the process a misunderstanding took place. Sigh. Who would have thought it would have affected her even till late at night, when we finally spoke on Skype.

I am really disappointed with myself. Elaine if you are reading this, do know that I did not, by any chance took your encouragement lightly. It really meant a lot to me. Not many people that I know am really able to comfort me when I am down. And yet, over one remark that I attempted to make a light joke about, you took it as a sarcasm. I am really sorry Elaine. My heart cries out even more for the fact that it hurt you and made you sad. Please forgive me. I could offer my tears to you...

September 30, 2011

We didn't talk much today. But despite that we still reaffirm our love for each other the same.

She went for her photography class today. It was really cool to look at all the photos that were taken. I can't wait to get my hands on a DSLR too. Canon EOS 550D or 600D? Argh. 600D I shall save up for. RAWR!

She then went for CG, whilst I was to join my company's Voice Team outing at a karaoke/pub. It wasn't really fun because the place was too small and the same people always kept singing and singing. Boring. Boo.

Upon reaching home, we only chatted a short while as she was really tired. She had to wake up very early tomorrow, so we wished each other goodnight. Sigh. I want to talk to her more. :(

September 29, 2011

Woke up this morning.. didn't know why I demanded so much from her. She must have been so disappointed.. I'm so sorry Elaine. :(

I profusedly apologize and after a while she was okay about it. She then mentioned how she miss the old times where people talk sweet things to each other when they are courting, such as those romantic novels or movies. The sweet little things.. simple yet able to melt someone's heart. It keeps the love going and that I certainly agree much. It's not just about having sex in marriage, but also to fill each other's love bank everyday with those sweet things, whether it be words, gifts or through actions. :)

Later on at night.. her surprised was spoiled by someone so close to her. She did something she has been doing every year to Elaine, which was rather insensitive. It was then my turn to comfort her. I manage to pull out a few story-based joke and I was happy to know that she felt much better with it.

Just before we Skyped, I got offended by one of her friends whom think I was not worthy enough for Elaine. It really got into my nerves a while, but I kept my cool and said a very strong 3 word on Facebook. "Hmm." Good thing he got the signal. Didn't really bother much of him anymore after that. Am I really not that good to Elaine in the eyes of the people back there? :/